What was, and what will be....

This is what I wrote last year at New Year's time. I thought it was very well written, and still applicable today. This year I teach First grade, my passion is for my children at school and my children at home.

2017-18 One Little Word? Many Little Words?

One of my friends posted her word for 2017 on social media this morning. The truth is, I haven't even thought about 2017 yet. I still have over 12 hours left in 2016, right?! But I started thinking about what will be MY defining word this year, my focus, the one word, ideal, concept that I come back to again and again.

PASSION. Passion for Kinders, their families, my children, pedigogy, learning, living, and possibly even loving. I mean, why do anything half-(way). Right? I could really get into this. Because I think this word already defines me. I am not a half-(way)-er. I am a whole-way-er. I tend to jump in whole-heartedly to both the good and the not-so-good for me. So passion. But wait.... I'm already there on the passion thing. In fact, maybe temperance would be a better choice. I need to slow down and really weigh out what I get so all-firing passionate about. Maybe.

But then again....

JOY. Maybe 2017 is a year for sheer joy. I am happier with myself, my life, and more at peace with the wreckage of my past than I have ever been. So maybe this is the year to bask in the glory of it all. Joy. But that seems to be a natural by-product of my FOCUS. Because when I focus on what is good and right in myself and the world, the world becomes a better place. Focus is how I got to joy in the first place. So maybe Joy isn't my word after all....

So maybe a good word would be....

HEALTH. I want to focus on my health. More water. Actually make and show up for Doctor appointments. More fresh fruits and veggies and whole foods. Less convenience foods and highly processed foods (which happen to be my favorite and my comfort foods). So getting regular movement in, changing my eating habits, drinking more water and for heavens sake, go to the bathroom when I need to! (Teachers are notorious for holding it ALL. DAY. LONG. and my kidneys are rather angry at me about this). But there is so much more to health than just the physical. There is the spiritual side. Which often drives and overrides the physical health part. So maybe my word should be....

SPIRITUALITY. I want to be more Zen in 2017. Chill. Go with the flow. Increase my awareness of what is going on within my heart and soul. Pursue yoga. Find a church. okay, I think I found a church, I "just" need to commit to getting there. Which is easier said than done. This requires both getting up AND getting dressed. At a reasonable hour. On the weekend. So that part.... I dunno. But being aware of what I feel, and accepting it. A good goal.

INTROSPECTION would be a good goal/word too. Reflecting on what went right, what went wrong and what can I do differently next time. Wait. I do that. Daily. Sometimes lesson by lesson. Sometimes minute by impulsive minute. So maybe I am satisfied with my current level of introspection. So moving on....

BALANCE. Ah, that word makes me vomit in my mouth a little. It has also been my goal for many years already. So no thank you. It is great in theory, but I find that it inhibits my passion, which I am much more excited about than my balance. So I give up on balance. Don't tell my youngest child, she's waiting for me to find more balance. But something I need to focus on is learning....

EDUCATION. Life-long learner. Isn't that what teachers commit to? Being life-long learners? Exciting. It is exciting. But I NEED to find the passion and the drive to pursue the Masters of Education plan that I have committed to. UGH. I am not currently passionate about this. But it will improve my quality of life and the quality of the lives of the children I so dearly love and what to educate to find an easier, softer way than the way I took. So I need to stop playing around with this, because I am currently a student and I need to become a studious one. So maybe I need perseverance. I need to commit whole-heartedly to this education choice I've made and let it be part of my passion.

In case you haven't noticed, I don't know that there will be ONE LITTLE WORD for me this next  year.  But I loved my word last year.... MOMENTUM. The pendulum has swung to the good, the passionate, the confident side. I have less self-doubt than I ever have. I want to keep going. Keep focusing on what is right and good and watch the good in my life increase. That was what I envisioned for 2016 and it was a good word and goal. It has been a year of positive momentum and also a year of growth. A year of passion and there's even been some joy. My real hope is that I look for the good in others and that I offer compassion as a constant gift to those around me and especially to my students.

Happy New Year's Eve Day. Or introspection and reflection day. or some such thing.