So hard.
It takes practice.
Turn it over.
practice different behaviors.
Pick it up again.
Put it down.
Practice new behaviors.
Pick up old behaviors.
It's the dance.
Okay. Here's the deal. Last Summer I got serious about changing my health. Between June 21st and December 10th I lost almost 30 pounds.... 28 to be exact. But, you know.... holidays. winter. And slowly, celebration by celebration, more and more sugar crept into my life again. Then soda pop (or whatever you call it, Coca-Cola to be exact). Walking became lonely. Healthy eating became a chore. I got more and more out of practice.
Now I feel stuck. 10 pounds heavier. Sugar addicted. Sluggish. I have started experiencing health problems that I had not dealt with for months.
Every morning, I start out strong. I resolve to eat well, avoid sugar, walk for my mental and emotional health. After I get done with my day, I don't care anymore. I want sugar, I want my chair, and a mindless tv show. I want cookies, carbs, and comfort.
I want it. I don't want it. I want it. I don't want it. I want it.
I want it. I think.
How do I get back to wanting it all the time? Because my health is in need. And my soul. And my emotions.
Here I go again.
You can do it! I'm on a similar path... trying to reorient myself to the health I was feeling last year... It can be frustrating for sure... but if you did it before, you can do it again -- that's what I keep telling myself anyway!
ReplyDeleteI have walked your walk, and walked it and walked it and walked it! It is hard always to be motivated, to make right choices. You can do it! Give yourself positive self talk...and don't give up. Focus on the health benefits and not the numbers. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteI've been on this roller-coaster myself. I think if you can get through the first week of no sugar and daily exercise, you'll find you're back on track. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteIt's so, so hard. Sugar. Damn it! I sincerely hope you get back on the right track - hard as it may be - writing about it is such a good step!!
ReplyDeleteWe can do it! Unfortunately you have to start even when you think you can't do it and even when you really don't want to. The hardest part for me is the beginning. After just a few days I always feel better. Just haven't got there yet.
ReplyDelete