Sunday, May 25, 2014
So insanity is having a good run at me today. The pain of feeling family-less is starting to set in and I have a gaping hole in my chest. The insanity I witnessed this past week lives in my soul and I feel like pulling it out and dusting it off and giving it a prominent place in my head/heart. What does that mean? It means that the voices in my head are loud today, voicing lots of insane ideas and if I am not careful, I will believe them. Especially since I am already insecure and heartbroken. The biggest part of this heartbreak is a direct result of my loved ones listening to the voices of insanity in their own head and concocting resentments where there were none, but after all my wrong-doings (concocted by the voices) were aired, now there is certainly resentment and hatred. So please dear God don't let me believe the voices or air any of the insanity the voices bring. Gloom, despair and agony on me. You know what my friends say... "when you consult the voices in your head, you are consulting with idiots." Yep.
Hi, my name is ___________ and I'm an addict. I'm also a productive member of society today. My society is a pretty small town. So I created an anonymous blog. My user name showing as Nunya Bizniss isn't really my first choice, but I needed to keep anonymous. I am trying desperately to extract myself from some very destructive family drama and lifelong patterns. I want to break these because as many mistakes as I've made in the past and as wrong as I often am, I want to continue on a path to becoming a better person today. I will practice forgiveness when I need to, and today I will try to be the best person I can be today. I pray that I might be open to God's path. I know good things are on the horizon.